Oh The Poo I Encounter During My Runs…


Day 1,635 – The Canal

Day 1,635 – 11,847 Miles 

It’s difficult to run on the canal when the weather is nice.  It’s possible, but I just wish the weather would pull up its pants and keep its mouth shut.  I welcome bad weather, because then it belongs to me and my short shorts.

8 Days til Boston.


Day 1,634 – Carmel Marathon Relay Recap

Day 1,634 – 11,839 Miles

Everyone on our 4 man team is going to Boston in 9 days, so our team name was Boston Bound.  I was leg #4 which was 4.2 miles.

Completely solo. Mile 2.5-4 were almost entirely uphill, just a steady incline most of the way, I could tell I was slowing down. Also around that time is when I merged with the Half Marathoners. Didn’t have much of a race mentality, since I didn’t have an adrenaline rush beforehand like I normally do at the starting line. I was all by myself at the exchange zone. During the last half mile, I kicked it into gear, last .2 I kicked again, and then with less than .1, I kicked once more. Finished very strong and very fast through the chute. Overall, good performance.  Our 4 man team won $250 and some pint glasses.  That’ll go towards our Boston jackets.

Mile 1 – 5:24 
Mile 2 – 5:24 
Mile 3 – 5:27 
Mile 4 – 5:25ish 
.2 – 1:10ish 

Day 1,608 – Shamrock 4mi Recap

Day 1,608 – 11,458 Miles


It was pretty windy out. top 4 ran in a single file first 2.5 miles, that’s when #1 dropped back 4th, #2 took the lead, I took 2nd, 3rd guy behind me. Around mile 3, 3rd place guy passed me and moved up on #1, taking the lead around 3.5. At the last turn of the race, I surged and passed the 2nd place guy, outkicking him at the finish line, beating him by .1 seconds. He tried going with me, but I got him. This is the first time I’ve ever beaten that guy. About time too. He got me in the Polar Bear race a few weeks ago. Payback. Lost by only 3 seconds. Probably one of the smartest races I’ve run. If the finish wasn’t directly after a 90º turn, maybe I could’ve turned it on a little sooner and got the 1st place guy. 


Also, Take the last 3 miles and I probably PRed in a 5k during this race. Felt pretty good. Perfect weather, but like I said, a little windy. 10mph.

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Newspaper spelled my name wrong, annnnnnd it wasn’t a 5k.

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Day 1,585 – Polar Bear 5k Recap

Day 1,585 – 11,211 Miles

This was an optional double.  5k, 5mi, or both.  Those who did both, did not count towards placement in 5k or 5mi, only in double.  I did the 5k, so even though I got 5th, I technically got 2nd, because 3 of the people in front of me were registered for the double… and so I won $50.

Honestly didn’t know how fast I’d go, since I don’t think I’ve been under 6min pace since December. Also didn’t know how fast I was actually going during the race because the mile markers had to be off. All I knew was, a teammate was going for 5:27’s. When we went through the first mile in 5:48, I couldn’t tell if I was slow or the markers were just off… realized that at the end when I went sub 5. After mile 2, I dropped my teammate and took off. This is a certified 5k, although it is really 3.12 which comes out to more like a 16:45.

It felt tough, but I’m not that sore and probably could’ve ran a little further at that pace. I did feel like throwing up around mile 2, just wasn’t feeling good.


Day 1,510 – St. Nik Lauf 5k Recap

Day 1,510 – 10,754 Miles

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Day 1,475 – Monumental Half Marathon Recap

Day 1,475 – 10,685 Miles

Saw the chiropractor for a few weeks following this race, had some tightness near the groin area and my quad. This was caused by plantar fasciitis, probably from babying my foot during chicago and this race.

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Day 1,456 – Chicago Marathon Recap

Day 1,456 – 10,620 Miles

2 days after Chicago.  Ran the race with shingles and bronchitis.  Lost energy right at the halfway point, started coughing a lot.  horrible race.

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Day 1,427 – Forrest Gump

Day 1,427 – 10,394 Miles

I’m not picking on any specific person, because it happens quite often, but people think they are so clever when they yell, “Run Forrest, run!” from their car window, or even reference Forrest Gump simply because I’m a runner.

[palm in face].

And these people say it without even thinking about it!  Forrest Gump was mentally challenged.  He was made fun of and picked on, and all he could do is run from the bullies.  Yelling, “Run Forrest, run!” is not setting a good example… for anyone.  They might as well yell, “Run retard, run!”  And last I checked, I’m not mentally challenged.

So let’s end, “Run Forrest, run!” please.


Plantar Fasciitis is still lingering, today was rough actually.  I did just run 11 miles at a 6:29 pace though.  I’ll take it.

I’ve also been keeping track of how many calories I get everyday.

Last week (tues-sun), I averaged around 3600 calories per day, capping at 4100 one day.  I should probably eat somewhere between 3500-4500 daily with how many calories I burn in the 90-120 mins of running every day.  Like today for example, I burned at least 1,200 calories running 11 miles.

Fat avg: 82g / 22%
Carbs: 545g / 64%
Protein: 124g / 15%

Since I weigh around 138lbs, I should be getting around 110g of protein per day.  Which towards the end of the week last week, I was getting around 150 per day.  I’d like to bring that Fat avg down to around 15-20% and get the protein up around 20%, with the rest being carbs.  Most of the fat is coming from lunch, because I like Peanut Butter.  It’s going well, and I’m eating A LOT!  Every night, I’m making dinner for at least 4 people (for myself), and I never have leftovers.  Need fuel to run.

26 Days until the Chicago Marathon!

Day 1,426 – Gazelle Photo

Day 1,426 – 10,383 Miles

All signed up for Boston.  Registered with my 2:39:30 from Chicago last year.

I hit 85 miles last week, I did have a rolling 7 days in there where I had 98 miles though.

Also messed around in photoshop the other day:


Day 1,420 – Still Going

Day 1,420 – 10,307 Miles

August is over, I logged 335 miles that month.  A lot has been going on, break up, moving, getting settled in, dealing with plantar fasciitis.  Here we are in September, one week down and I ran 80 miles last week.

Two notable runs from last week:

Monday: 11 mile tempo in 1:05:49 (5:59 pace), solo.  I know at one point I had two back to back miles 5:21 & 5:17 according to the mile markers.

Sunday: 18 miler in 1:54:34 (6:22 pace).  Plan was for me to run 2 hours or 18 miles, whichever came first.  It was humid out.  Out in 58:13. I know my first two miles were 14 flat. Hamstring started to tighten up after awhile. Also, stopped after the halfway point to get water, but the door was locked, so I was screwed. took a gel though.

Getting there.

Day 1,399 – Supermanning a tree & Plantar Fasciitis

Day 1,399 – 10,071 Miles

Last Wednesday was my birthday, I celebrated by running my 10,000th consecutive mile.

On Saturday during my 20 miler, I tripped over a root in the woods and in the superman position, flew into a tree.  Luckily I reacted quick enough and twisted my torso, so my shoulder didn’t completely ram into it.



I’ve been dealing with Plantar Fasciitis for about a month now, it’s in the early stages, so I think I can get it under control before it gets worse.  Been icing and heating and rolling and massaging.  Even got a couple Feetures socks to sleep in that help.


My mileage has been in the 70’s for three weeks now, so I may shoot for 80 this week.

Day 1,379 – 1 Mile Track Recap & My New Pocket Discovery

Day 1,379 – 9,866 Miles

I won a true 1 mile race last Thursday at an all comers track meet with a 4:36.  The weather was a lot better than the week before, only 80°.  I started out in the lead.  At 200m, a tall fella with bad form jumped in front of me, I stayed behind him in 2nd place until the third lap when he died.  I passed him on the back stretch during his eulogy.  Another guy (same kid who dropped out of the race last week), started moving up beside me in lane 2 as we went around the turn.  I held him there, making him run farther, then blew him away the remaining 500 meters, I don’t let people out kick me… and the only reason I made him run farther was because he wore a marathon shoe to a 1 mile race.  Won by 7 seconds.  Anyway, I felt a little tired before the race, mainly because I already put in 7 miles.  I wish I would’ve picked it up a little bit more at the halfway mark though.  A lot better than the Fast Track Mile 3 weeks before.

70 / 70 / 71 / 63


Last night I was thrilled when I discovered a new pocket in a pair of Mizuno running shorts that I’ve had for 3 years.  I never wear them while racing because the pocket wasn’t big enough to hold any gels.  These shorts have moved 3 spots up from the bottom of my racing shorts pile.

I ran across a pair of panties and 2 pair of tighty whities since my last post.  I also found a penny.  Since I’m still not fast enough to win race money, I’ll take what I can get during my training runs… that is until they start giving money to 4th place finishers.

Tally Board
Honk:  +1
Wooo!:  +2
Photographer:  +1
I see you running all the time: +2
Compliment:  +1
Cheeseburger Mouth:  +1

Items Found
Panties/Underwear:  +3

Money Earned
1 Penny

Day 1,367 – 12.5 Laps in the heat

Day 1,367 – 9,747 Miles

Last night I ran a 5k at an All Comers meet.  Set a Meet Record by 20 seconds and PRed by 4 seconds.

84º – w/humidity, felt like 90º

76 / 80 / 81 / 81 // 78 / 78 / 80 / 79 // 79 / 79 / 77 / 71 // 32

5:21 // 5:15 // 5:10 // :32 = 16:17

I led the first 600m, then got passed by two 20 year olds.  As soon as they passed me, I was boxed in and the pace went from 76 to 80.  It was noticeable.  Around lap 5, they dropped back.  One dropped completely out, ended up passing the other one around lap 10.  My goal was to go sub 16, and I think I could’ve done that, especially if the weather was a bit cooler.  Overall, I’m impressed with myself.  Also broke in a brand new pair of Nike Matumbo’s that I purchased for 10 bucks!



Today I ran in 92º weather, of course it felt warmer than that.

Check out my foot!


Tally Board Update:
I see you running all the time: +1
Almost hit by car: +1
Photographer: +1
Sexy: +1
Laugh: +3
Honk: +1

Money Found:
25 cents

Day 1,362 – Two Race Recaps, Progress, and The Usual

Day 1,362 – 9,711 Miles

It’s been two months since I updated, so I have plenty to cover.  I ran two races.  The first one was on June 15, it was a 5k on the canal downtown Indianapolis.  My weekly training leading up to this race consisted mainly of short runs ranging from a 5:50 pace to an avg of about 6:50 pace.  Weekly mileage hovered around 30’s.  I did one track workout, a modified 30/40, I tried keeping mine at 34/44.  You can read about my workout in my Training Log.  Less than two weeks later, I ran the Run For Ronald 5k.

Run for Ronald 5k – June 15th

I PR’ed at this race last year with a 16:21.  It’s tough to run a 5k on the canal because of all the turns, really cuts into your momentum.  The last .1 had about 12 turns in it and two ramps.  During the first mile, I was in 9th place, went through in 5:18.  At mile two I pulled away into 6th place, but went through slower in 5:20.  Somewhere in the 3rd mile, I turned it on and busted out a 5:11, passed two guys and finished 4th place in 16:21 (Again), just a mere 4 seconds away from collecting cash.  It’s really funny.  I placed 4th last year with the same time.  Also had another repeat bib number.  My hip/hamstring hurt after this.

A few days before that race, I bit the bullet and saw a chiropractor about my hip and hamstring.  She’s legit, works on olympians and USA Track & Field people. When I told her what was going on, who I’ve seen, and that I needed to start my Chicago Marathon training no later than July 1st, she said, “Well you’ve seen all the right people and I’m good at getting people to 100% asap.”  I have been seeing her once a week since, doing the gratson technique/ART, and it’s amazing how much better I feel.  There have been a couple times where I walk in and I’m in total pain, but as soon as I leave, the pain is gone.  My leg is still a bit locked up at times, especially below the knee where the hamstring starts.  I have some knots deep in the glute and hamstring area.  Definitely feel a lot better though.

The second race I ran was on July 4th, the Fast Track Mile in Terre Haute.  I knew going into this race, it was going to be tough, I just haven’t done anything fast in awhile.  Typically the faster I go, the more my hamstring/hip ache, so I’ve steered away from doing fast crap.  In the month leading up to the race, I started running more 10 milers than little stuff, mainly because I need to start building up a base.  Weekly mileage stayed around 40 miles for a few weeks, topping out at 50 the week before.  I did one track workout 3 days before the race, which I regret doing.  You can check that out on my Training Log.  The day before this race, I ran my mile loop around the block, and it was quite painful.

Fast Track Mile – July 4th

I won this race by 8 seconds last year in 4:30.  They separate this race into two groups, women and men.  They alternate which group goes first every year.  This year, women went first.  The race was supposed to start at 8:15, but we started about 20 mins late, so I probably overstretched a bit.  I never did find my stride during this race.  My legs just didn’t turn like they should’ve, just a little locked up.  First quarter was 72.  By the second quarter, I was boxed in by a kid and an older guy throwing elbows, went through in 73.  I stayed behind those guys just before the third quarter, when I snuck in between them and went through in 73.  During the last quarter, I put in a little effort and kicked past a few guys finishing in 4:45 with a 65 second split.  8th place.  boo.  Oh well, it was still fun! :)


Onto other things.  I’ve been getting, I see you running all the time, quite a bit lately.  At a brewery, I had 5 people tell me.  At a bar, 4 people.  At a baseball game, 1 person.  At a frozen yogurt place, 1 person.  I have a fan club.  Some guys at a bar told me they see me all the time running at the canal, that I’m famous, that they take photos of me when they see me and send them to each other, that I’m known as The Gazelle. They weren’t making fun of me though, they run too and just wanna be like me. Totally flattering to have a fan club.  Ronald Freaking McDonald even pointed at me and asked me if I were a Gazelle.  It’s getting out of control.  Please, don’t disturb me in my natural habitat.

Tally Board Update:
I see you running all the time – 11
I like your shoes – 1
Passing people on wheels – 2
Nice Shorts! – 2
Cheeseburger Mouth – 3
Put some clothes on! – 1
Drive Thru Window – 4
Almost hit by car – 3
Weight Related – 4
WTF?!/OMG! – 3
Photographer – 2
How You Doin? – 2
Whistle/Woo! – 6
Compliment – 3
Laugh – 5
Sexy!! – 1
Honk – 5

Items Stumbled Upon:
Tighty Whities – 1
Panties – 1

Day 1,300 – New Training Plan

Day 1,300 – 9,354 Miles

Pretty soon I need to think about starting my training for the Chicago Marathon in October.  I’m still a little hurt, but I’m slowly going to try to get some conditioning in.  I need to start my actual training no later than July, so I’d like to get healthy by then.

In the meantime, I need a good solid base.

I’m alternating days on and off, almost like a week long fartlek. This week I’m going to try to do 3/1/5/1/7/1/9. The 1’s will be my easy days off, the 3,5,7 & 9 will all be faster. My idea is I can get some speed work and some distance in by doing this, and also get some recovery in there. Went at a 5:55 pace today for 3, the 5 miler will probably be slower, hoping around 6:10-6:30, the 7 should be 6:30-6:45, and the 9 between 6:45 & 7. I’ll try to keep the 1 mile days no faster than 7 mins.

As I do this for several weeks, I’ll make sure to increase my mileage by throwing in some doubles and switch up the distances according to how I feel, but I like the ladder idea. Off days will be more like 2 in the AM and 2 in the PM.

It could work.

Weird thing found:
used condom +1

Added to Tally Board

Day 1,296 – Mini Marathon Recap

Day 1,296 – 9,342 Miles

Saturday was the mini marathon here in Indianapolis.  Training has been going… well, training hasn’t really been going.  I hardly ran in the four weeks leading up to the race.  Streak is still alive though. I’ve been seeing a massage therapist for a few weeks now, trying to loosen up the muscles around my hip/hamstring.

Since I hadn’t been running much, I knew it was going to be somewhat difficult going in.  I thought I might be able to go 1:18, but realistically  1:20 seemed more appropriate.  I felt great for the first 5 miles, but fell apart at the halfway point and started slowing down.  Around 10.5 miles, I took a water and immediately regretted doing so, because it sloshed around in my stomach for the next couple miles, until I eventually had to stop and throw up (with 1/2 mile to go).  I wanted to pick up my pace, and could have, but my stomach wouldn’t let me.  If it weren’t for that, I probably would’ve been under 1:20 for sure.  It was also very windy, 15mph.  Finished in 1:20:48.  I think the humidity got to me, that and the last time I ran over 10 miles was in November.

Mile 1 – 5:56
Mile 2 – 6:00
Mile 3 – 5:57
Mile 4 – 5:57
Mile 5 – 6:03
Mile 6 – 6:10
Mile 7 – 6:13
Mile 8 – 6:12
Mile 9 – 6:10
Mile 10 – 6:15
Mile 11 – 6:14
Mile 12 – 6:14
Mile 13 – 6:48 (Stopped to Puke around 12.5)
.1 – 0:31

75th place/30,071

My hip/hamstring did not hurt throughout the race, only as soon as I crossed the line did it bother me.  The pain shot down to my lower leg, below the knee.  I wasn’t as sore as I normally am, but I still ached the following days.  The day after the race, I did hot yoga for the first time.  My girlfriend said I didn’t do too bad, even though I’m about as flexible as a stick of spaghetti.  Someone just needs to boil me.

I just got done running 5 miles.  Did it in 32:24, last 2 miles were in 12:20, so my post race recovery isn’t going too bad.


Day 1,275 – Breakthrough?

Day 1,274 – 9,283 Miles

After 5 months of PT and Dr appts, they told me I had a sciatic nerve problem, which may be caused by a bulging disc in my lower back, and that I also had weak glutes and hamstrings. Their solution was to give me 75 different stretches and a crap ton of bills. Nothing ever seemed to work and nothing they told me ever explained why my leg felt like it was falling out of its socket. So I gave up on all those stretches and started running through it again. My MRI showed I had inflammation in my high hamstring area, which is consistent with a stress reaction, and also iliopsoas bursitis. Nothing in my hip, which doesn’t make sense because that’s where I hurt the most.

Friday was my first Deep Tissue session with a massage therapist. I’ve had a total of 3 appointments since. Tonight we may have found the culprit. Quadratus Femoris. Throw out all that crap the PTs and Doc told me. I think i’m finally getting somewhere.


Day 1,272 – Next race

Day 1,272 – 9,274 Miles

Yesterday was a very rough day.  At my next race, the Indianapolis Mini-Marathon, someone needs to give the Morpheus speech from The Matrix: Reloaded.

Runners, hear me! It is true, what many of you have heard. The machines have gathered an army and as I speak, that army is drawing nearer to our home.  Believe me when I say we have a difficult time ahead of us. But if we are to be prepared for it, we must first shed our fear of it. I stand here, before you now, truthfully unafraid. Why? Because I believe something you do not? No, I stand here without fear because I remember. I remember that I am here not because of the path that lies before me but because of the path that lies behind me. I remember that for 100 years we have fought these machines. I remember that for 100 years they have sent their armies to destroy us, and after a century of war I remember that which matters most… We are still here! Today, let us send a message to that army. This morning, let us run these streets. Tonight, let us tremble these halls of earth, steel, and stone, let us be heard from red core to black sky. Tonight, let us make them remember, WE ARE RUNNERS AND WE ARE NOT AFRAID!

Had to change that around. Actually I always thought that would be a funny quote to say before a race, even after yesterday… along with the Braveheart speech.

Day 1,265 – Why I Run

Day 1,265 – 9,252 Miles

A few weeks ago, I ran into a “facebook friend” at a bar in Terre Haute.  We talked for a little bit, his breath smelled like a pig farm, and he went on about reading my posts on facebook about running.  He asked me, “What’s the point though?  What is running going to do for you?  What can you even do with that?”  My immediate response was, “There are a ton of reasons.  It keeps you feeling young, energized, it’s a great stress reliever, and I have my own personal reasons as well.”  It wasn’t worth getting into it.  He still didn’t quite understand, then he said, “This is probably going to offend you, but I taught my son something bad.  He caught on to me, because the other day he yelled “Chicken Chaser!” at a guy running down the street.  But you know, that’s what we did.  We called you runners, Chicken Chasers, ’cause you know… that’s the way we were brought up.”  He tried smoothing that over by saying, “But I’m sure once you start running, it just becomes a lifestyle, because you do it so f’n much, but I don’t understand it.”  I didn’t have much to say after that, and I don’t think he cared anyway, because he was half drunk.  I thought about this for awhile and it made me a little upset.  What is yelling “Chicken Chaser” going to do for YOU??  What is the point of teaching your child a bad habit?  What can you even do with your pig farm breath?  I have my reasons why I run, and it’s deeper than “because that’s the way I was brought up.”  Aside from prostate cancer, I’m the only thing that runs in my family.  Here are a few of my reasons:

Reason #1:  I’m addicted.  I haven’t taken a day off in 3 years, 5 months, 18 days.  I do get a lot of heat for streaking though, and apparently that’s why I’m currently injured, or because I’m vegan.  I don’t buy that though, my “off days” are only 1 milers and I feel healthier than I ever have been.

Reason #2:  Why I streak.  I feel like if I take a day off, I’m more likely to take another day off, and then another, and eventually, I’ll get comfortable enough to take a week off, and so on. It keeps me motivated.

Reason #3:  It makes me happy.  If you hate running or simply don’t understand it, you haven’t found the right place to run yet.  It’s a great feeling to run on a rim of a rock quarry or to get lost on a trail in the middle of nowhere.  So leave your neighborhood, and head for the forestry, you might like it.

Reason #4:  It’s a great stress reliever.  Have a bad day at work?  Go for a long run, no headphones, just you and your thoughts.  When you get home, allow yourself to relax, you’ll sleep well.

Reason #5:  I’m 30, I have the body of a 20 year old, and feel like it.

Reason #6:  One of the main reasons I run, is because of the very last thing my grandpa said to me 10 years ago, hours before he died.  He said, “Don’t stop Running.”  Even though he never saw me run, or probably didn’t understand either why I did, he could sense that it was something I was passionate about, that it was something that made me happy, and that was all that mattered.

So tomorrow will be Day 1,266, and even though I’ve been hurt for the last 6 months, I’m not giving up.  I’m feeling better every day.

Tally Board Update:
Honk +2
How You Doin? +1
You’re Making Me Look Bad +1
Photographer +1
See You Running All The Time +1
Something about Kenyans +1
Laugh +1
Drive Thru Window +1

Day 1,260 – Dropped Something?

Day 1,260 – 9,219 Miles

It’s been awhile. Still running, still hurt, kinda. Got an MRI, signed up for Chicago Marathon, found out I don’t have a stress fracture, found out I have a couple stress reactions, ran a 4 mile race (got 4th 22:39).

MRI Results:

1.low-level marrow edema in the right ischial tuberosity deep to the common hamstring tendon. This is consistent with mild stress reaction.
2. Trace edema within the right iliopsoas bursa which may represent mild iliopsoas bursitis. The remaining tendons and muscles are intact.

Do I know what this is?  Not really.  He said to keep taking it easy, that I need to work on strengthening my hamstrings and glutes, stay away from speed work and hills, and listen to my body. I asked how serious it is on a 1-10, he gave it a 1. Who knows how bad it was 4 months ago.

Last night I bought some compression shorts, hoping that will help.  I’ve been increasing my mileage by about 2 miles per week.  I don’t feel pain when I run.  I can tell you that I don’t hurt much at all in the 2 areas where I have a stress reaction.  My main pain is coming from my glute, by my hip.

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Tonight on my run, I must have said something very offensive in a response, because after I said it, I got, “F F M-F’er blah blah F F F blah blah big mac F F!!” I guess I should tell you what they said first though that made them blow up like that. The weather was great, so I’m in short shorts and a long sleeve, and I was running towards a saggy panted guy and his gross looking girlfriend. They stopped in their tracks and began laughing. When I passed, the girl said, “uhhhh you dropped something… hahahaha!” So my reply was, “nope, you did.” Can’t believe they were offended by that, oh well. That’s twice in the last week someone has told me I dropped something. I’m lost, I didn’t drop anything. Maybe next time I’ll bend over and pick up the imaginary d-bag card they dropped.

“Dropped Something” added to Tally Board. I’m also going to start counting the amount of money I find on my runs. So far this year I’ve made 50 cents.

I’m also going to start listing some of the weird things I see on my runs. Over the last month, I found a thong, a 4 pack of condoms, a family of turtles, and a washed up car fender stuck in the mud on the bank of the river.

Tally Board Update:
Compliment: 3
How You Doin?: 1
Laugh: 4
I See You Running All the Time: 1
Honk: 2
Whistle: 1
Drive Thru Window: 1
Cheeseburger Mouth: 1
Dropped Something: 2
Chased by Dog: 1